Singing Confidence: How to get confident in your singing

I was teaching someone this week and the topic of singing confidence came up. There are several articles on my site pertaining to confidence in singing, but I don’t think I’ve talked specifically about this topic of gaining confidence in one’s singing.

Do you relate to this experience?

For some, they’ve never felt confident in their singing. For other singers, they remember being more confident in their singing and their voice. They remember being able to just open their mouth, and a strong, solid, dependable sound came out. Singing was something they enjoyed, looked forward to, and the more they did it, the more confidence it gave them.

But often something shifts as we get older. We start to notice little slips here and there. That vocal tone we were once proud of doesn’t seem to sound quite right – but we’re not sure whether it’s that:

our voice has changed;
we are hearing our voice differently;
our ability to command our voice has changed/suffered; or
some or all of the above.

So when we open our mouth, we are never 100% sure what’s going to come out. It could be good, could be GREAT… but it could also be bad, or even awful.

Worse still, the voice doesn’t behave the same way as we go through a session of singing. Maybe it starts out great, then it deteriorates. Perhaps it starts out a bit rocky and we expect it to improve, but it’s 50/50 whether it ever does.

A lack of certainty = madness

The fundamental issue at play here, is a lack of certainty over the sound our voice will make when we go to sing.

How can you EVER feel confident, if it’s like a flipping a coin every time you go to sing? Worse still, if it feels like it’s 20 sided dice every time you open your mouth – any one of 2-20 different outcomes could occur.

It is 100% impossible to feel comfortable with your singing and your voice under this framework.

The Fallacious Appeal to Emotion

Now at this point, a lot of people want to talk about ‘confidence’ as a by-product of how one feels about their voice. And if we could only make someone FEEL better about their voice, then all would be well.

Firstly, yes, we absolutely need to ensure someone has positive feelings about their voice. But this is NOT achievable in isolation.

Our feelings are variable day to day. How I feel about my voice massively varies day to day. If I’ve not slept well, if I’ve been getting over an illness, if I’m just generally feeling down, all of that will affect how I feel about my voice.

Yet, my voice always performs, and I always have a dispassionate certainty that my voice will be able to do what it needs to do.

That is real confidence, and it is NOT steeped in emotion. It may overlap with emotion, and good feelings about your voice may flow from that objective certainty. But that certainty of outcome is not driven by how you feel – it’s the other way around. How you feel about your voice should be driven by the certainty you have in how your voice will perform.

Easier said than done, so here is the framework we have to follow.

An alternate framework (the only one that works)

Consistency > Certainty > Confidence

Here’s the logic…

The only way to be confident about your voice, is to be 99% certain of what is going to come out of your mouth before you open it to sing.
99% = 99 times out of 100, you know what the outcome will be. That means you need to have put in at least 100 reps of something in your voice, and found 99 reps come out much the same way.
The only way to acquire that level of certainty, is to train your voice in a very predictable consistent manner day to day, in order to iron out that level of consistency and dependability in your voice.
In training in this way, you become so used to the outcome, you become almost blasé about what will happen – you’ve done it so many times you’re basically certain it will happen as before.
THAT’S the kind of confidence we are trying to acquire.

To acquire a consistent voice (that begets certainty), we have to train CONSISTENTLY. This means training the voice in a range that is manageable, to settle it down so it is stress free. That means no hail Mary’s, no pushing for just one more note beyond where you’re comfortable.

If there is ANY variability (ala the ‘coin flipping’ where you’re not sure what’s going to happen) in your day to day training, you are building that variability and uncertainty into your voice.

The ONLY way to cultivate a voice that ALWAYS behaves in a way that you can predict and trust, you must TRAIN in a range and a manner that your voice cannot go wrong.

Don’t stop yourself mid-exercise – complete each exercise, and assess how well it went. If it went awry several times – it’s not consistent enough to rely on, so you cannot expect certainty nor the resultant confidence.

And to get to 99% certainty, that’s 99 attempts out of 100 yielding an expected and predictable result – which means you need to put in 100 reps, minimum. There’s no escaping the body of work you need to put in to acquire this certainty. You can’t just will yourself into confidence.

Most people don’t train like this. They keep flinging their voice at songs, stopping and starting, abandoning repetitions and lines of songs midway, or even after the first note. This isn’t just a waste of time, you are TRAINING uncertainty into your voice.

Why the above framework delivers

As boring as this may seem, and as restrictive as this may appear, it’s necessary.

When you do this, you’ll remove any stress response in your voice over that controlled range.

As this stress response abates, your range will grow slightly. You’ll then iron out that new range with that same consistent approach, and your range will increase slightly again. Wash, rinse, repeat.

And throughout all of this, that initial range you’re working on and that new range you’re adding – you don’t notice that you’re singing higher, as it feels just as easy as the initial “boring” range you started with.

Conclusion: Practice to build certainty

All confidence lies in certainty of the outcome. If we lack consistency in our voice and our practice, certainty and confidence will always remain elusive.

If this all “sounds great” but you’re not sure how to deploy this in your own voice, you can start work with my by clicking the ‘Work with Mark’ button below.

November 16, 2025November 16, 2025

The Three Notes Every Singer Struggles With

Today I want to talk about the three notes that every singer struggles with.

A few caveats:

Individual singers will typically only struggle with ONE of these at a time – Because if they are struggling with the first of these, they won’t be doing subsequent ones any justice at all.
These notes are the lynchpin root causes of vocal problems – Once I state the notes, singers reading this will say “ah well, I am personally fine with that one, it’s the note one above/below that I find hard“. That may well be their interpretation of what they think they are noticing, but these are merely symptoms of the underlying issue. The root causes of people’s perceived vocal limitations are these specific notes.

The Notes

The notes are: E4 – A4 – E5.

These are grouped for men and woman as:

For men: E4 and A4
For women: A4 and E5

What are these notes?

The way the voice works, is that to sing low notes the vocal folds contract and thicken. To sing high notes they stretch and thin. The sound emitted by the vocal folds is shaped by the vocal tract, which is the length of your throat above your larynx (Adam’s apple).

These two components acoustically interact with each other to generate a phenomenon we call ‘vocal bridges’ or passagi/passagio. To sing with any meaningful range, we need to be able to cross these bridges – at least the first bridge, and ideally the second also.

The Bridges

For men the first bridge is E4-F#4; the second is A4-B4.

For women the first bridge is A4-B4; the second is E5-F#5.

You’ll note that the male second bridge maps exactly onto the female first bridge.

The bridge exists over several notes, rather than just one note. It’s a transition zone from one register of the voice to the next. Hence, the three key notes are E4, A4 and E5.

However, the challenge I’m focusing on today is the difficulty in ENTERING each bridge cleanly. Landing the E4 to enter the first bridge for men/the A4 for women, is CRITICAL.

So many tend to either struggle to land that note at all, or they are technically hitting the note, but they are hitting it so hard they’ve not actually ENTERED the bridge. When excess force or imprecision exists in the vowels, they are just slamming their voice hard enough to force the vocal folds to hit the right pitch… but this does not mean they’ve made the acoustic transition INTO the bridge properly.

If the singer is not entering the first bridge cleanly, they cannot exit it cleanly to hit higher notes with ease and power. Think of it like clipping the first hurdle in a hurdle race. If you can’t even clear the first one cleanly, you’re not going anywhere well.

What about the second bridge?

The first bridge only provides the transition from chest to the first register within head voice. The second bridge is the next transition zone above that. Many more skilled singers (e.g. Bono of U2), actually have reasonably good first bridges, but they struggle at their second. This is why so often singers will lower songs when performing to put top notes on an Ab4, to avoid the A4 – that’s the second bridge revealing itself.

The same is true for women dealing with their first and second bridges. Often younger women have more facility at their first bridge than younger men, so they ‘vault over it’ and enjoy the range between the first and second bridge. But over time the deepening and thickening of their voice causes them to struggle with a clean entry/exit to the first bridge, so they can feel like they’ve lost a load of range in later life – often by their mid 30s.

Proper vocal training resolves this

These are only the reasons why people struggle with these notes, and correspondingly find higher notes than those hard to consistently sing.

Proper vocal training is all about co-ordinating the vocal folds and vocal tract, to co-ordinate the voice to smoothly cross those bridges, such that they become invisible to the singer and the listenable. This is all entirely solveable, to unlock ever increasing range, with greater ease and wonderful tone. it just takes time and concerted effort. Which is why most singers never reach it. It seems far ‘easier’ just to keep jamming your voice and forcing your way to that note that is 50/50 whether it comes out.

But now you’re at least equipped with knowing WHY you find specific notes difficult in your voice. It may feel like you get stuck at a note above or below the ones I’ve mentioned, but I can assure you that the mechanical and acoustic reason you find any part of your voice tricky, is because of these bridging notes.

If this echoes with your experience in your voice, and you feel you’re clipping any of these notes, you can book in via the work with me button below.

July 20, 2025August 1, 2025

10 Common Singing Myths — Debunked by a Professional Vocal Coach

10 Singing Myths Debunked by Science and Experience

There’s no shortage of opinions when it comes to singing. But many of the so-called “rules” passed around in voice lessons, online forums, and even music degrees simply don’t hold up to what we now know about the voice. If you’ve ever felt confused, frustrated, or stuck, there’s a good chance one of these myths is to blame.

Let’s debunk the 10 most common vocal myths that could be holding you back — and get you back on track toward a stronger, freer voice.

“You have to sing from your diaphragm.”

This one tops the list. It’s vague, misused, and usually misunderstood. Yes, breath support is essential — but singing is about vocal coordination, not just pushing air. Singing louder doesn’t mean singing better.
“You’re either born with it, or you’re not.”

This myth stops more singers than it should. The truth? Learning to sing is a skill like any other — one that improves with smart, consistent training.
“Falsetto is the same as head voice.”

Nope. Falsetto and head voice use different vocal fold behaviors. Understanding the difference is key to developing range and power. Here’s a quick explainer as to what falsetto is, and how it differs from head voice (plus why I don’t like falsetto)

Continue reading “10 Common Singing Myths — Debunked by a Professional Vocal Coach”

July 12, 2025July 12, 2025

Why learning to sing can feel so hard

Why Learning to Sing Can Feel So Hard

Short Version: You’re building an instrument you can’t see or touch, while also learning to play it.

Long Version:
Singing feels natural — but mastering it is anything but. Here’s why developing vocal skill is uniquely challenging, even for otherwise talented musicians.

You have to build the instrument, and train it to respond precisely in real time, while having no access to its moving parts.

Most instruments give you feedback. You move a key, press a string, shift a valve — and you see and feel something change. You can then try again and again until it feels right.

The voice offers no such feedback.

You sing a note, and you hear what came out a fraction of a second later. Then you try to internally feel what muscles created it.

You can’t see it, touch it, or directly manipulate it. It’s like building a model ship inside a bottle, with chopsticks, behind your back.

The level of precision required is extreme. You need to coordinate several muscle systems, simultaneously and precisely, across a wide range of intensities.

Most people never need that kind of motor control in their daily life. That’s why it feels so alien at first.

Continue reading “Why learning to sing can feel so hard”

October 29, 2023November 29, 2025

Vocal Myths: Voice Projection

Voice Projection – Why It’s Difficult and What You Can Do

I often receive messages from people having issues with their ‘voice projection’. One common instance is people who require their voice to be strong for their work. This week, I thought I’d talk about one such case so you can understand what they were battling with, and some constructive suggestions that can be made to improve their situation.

This particular voice user

They informed me that they were having trouble “projecting their voice” in a clear way that can be heard in a busy/loud environments, but also in group meetings/conversations.

They were looking for advice on whether there’s anything practical they could change or exercises they could do, or whether it’s something they were stuck with.

The reply I put together is something I realise that I’ve covered with clients in sessions, but not actually written down anywhere, so I thought I would relay the content of my reply here for you to read.

While this reply is centred around issues regarding being heard in work, the same logic applies if we are trying to be heard singing in bands/groups, or with other instruments.

Issues around “projection” and loud environments

The stated problem is multivariate, as such there is no short answer or simple solution. However, I’ll try to break it down as simply as I can, then provide some practical suggestions.

1) Some voices are quieter/louder than others

Just like some people’s physiological starting point predisposes them to be able to lift heavy in the gym, and others less so. Of course everyone can train to be stronger, but the physiological starting point is a big deal.

In the same way, certain voices’ physiological starting points are quieter, and others are louder. Everyone can train to improve the volume, quality, audibility and stamina in their voice, but some have louder/more easily heard starting points than others. This is just one factor.

2) “Projection” is a bit of a myth

There’s some weird cultural ideas about singing out there, and projection is one of them. There are absolutely certain qualities to great singers or orators where their voice seems to carry particularly well (which gets labelled as ‘projection’) but this is not an abstract concept or a switch that gets tripped. It’s a combination of trainable qualities, involving volume, intensity and specific frequencies in a given voice to name but a few.

Some voices have more of these qualities to begin with, some have less. This is why it’s not just about the volume of a given voice. Yes, these traits are absolutely trainable, but there’s no set of exercises or “trick” that switches these things on, especially in the casual voice user. It’s something we would look at in sessions, but it’s not something I can advise someone on without working with their voice.

3) The demands on your voice outstrips your vocal ability

Regardless of how loud/quiet your voice is, all issues like this are a result of the environments you are in outstripping your vocal ability. But you should know that even extremely loud voices encounter similar issues, simply because they are constantly asking more of their voice than it can deliver.

Through training my voice carries very well and is extremely audible in loud scenarios, but even my voice gets worn and fatigued in loud environments, e.g. loud pubs, swimming pools, sporting events, etc. Training your voice will undoubtedly improve it, but we need to recognise that some demands are too great for any voice to bear up under.

Without working with someone’s voice or being in their specific environments I cannot assess this fully, but I can give some preliminary suggestions to help voice users cope better.

Practical suggestions

1. Use electronic amplification in excessively loud environments – use amplification (e.g. loudhailer, speaker system) when you need to be heard in excessively loud environments. There is no point trying to compete with a room volume that you cannot win over.

2. Get close to individuals to speak whenever possible – in environments where you can get close to a given individual you need to communicate with, do so, thereby reducing the required volume to be heard.

3. Use your voice for less time when you cannot do the above / use hand signals where possible – By speaking less often and for less time, you reduce the duration you have to sustain it for, hence you can do so for longer.

4. Reduce vocal inflammation and damage – Once we accept that certain environments are going to cause some wear/tear no matter how well built your voice is, the best we can hope for is better recovery and minimise the damage. Hence, rest, sleep, plenty of water, reduced alcohol consumption, and some light rehab exercises can go a long way to mitigating the damage you cannot avoid.

Here’s a short video from one of the world’s leading voice researchers on something anyone can do to this.

Conclusion

The concept of projection while legitimate, is a bit of a red herring that people seek after. That if they “Just knew how to project”, then all their troubles would be over… when in reality it’s a bit of a constellation of things, and sometimes none of them make a substantive difference. Ultimately, there are limits to what a given person’s voice can handle in a given environment.

If you are personally finding yourself having issues with being heard and/or keeping your voice healthy after long days at work, certain loud environments, or maybe even your gigging schedule, rest assured it is entirely common but also very improvable with the right training. If you would like to book in a consultation to look at your voice and build a routine for your specific needs, you can do so via my booking form at www.markjwgraham.co.uk/booking.

October 30, 2022August 3, 2025

Bitesize Singing Myths

3 Common Singing Myths (and Why They’re Wrong)

In my work as a vocal coach, I often hear the same statements repeated by singers eager to improve. Some are valid goals—but others stem from widespread misconceptions. These singing myths often gain traction because they sound sensible on the surface, but when we dig deeper, we find that they’re misleading or outright unhelpful.

Let’s explore three of the most common singing myths I hear—and unpack why they’re mistaken, and what to focus on instead.

Singing Myth 1. “I need to work on my confidence”

I’ve written on confidence before, where our culture tends to prioritise charisma over competence. And sure—how we feel emotionally can affect how we perform. We’ve all had great days and terrible days.

But here’s the trap: many singers now believe that confidence is more important than technical ability. They place more emphasis on emotional readiness than on actual skill.

Emotions matter… but…

Yes, emotions influence performance. But they can’t make up for a lack of technical control. You need to possess the skill before emotion can elevate it.

Take a concert pianist. They don’t rely on “feeling confident” to play well—they train until playing the piece correctly becomes second nature. Only then does emotion take it to a higher artistic level.

The same is true in singing: competence comes first.

Take-home point: True confidence is a by-product of competence. Train your voice until singing well feels almost boring in its consistency—then you’ll find real confidence waiting for you.

Singing Myth 2. “I need to work on my breathing”

Breathing absolutely matters. We need breath to make sound. I give clients instructions related to breathing all the time. But just like with confidence, this area has become mythologised.

Some singers (and even some vocal methods) treat breath as the be-all and end-all—as if mastering it will fix everything.

Let’s consider the mechanics

Air is the fuel—but it’s not what makes the sound. The vocal folds inside your larynx act as valves that regulate airflow. They are the engine that transforms air into sound.

If your vocal folds aren’t trained to resist airflow correctly, the result will be:

Too little resistance → airy, weak tone; breath runs out fast
Too much resistance → tight, pressed tone; oxygen depletion without full breath use

So when someone says, “I need to work on my breathing,” 99% of the time the real issue lies in poor vocal fold coordination—not the breath itself.

It’s all trainable—but not by “working on breathing” alone

This misconception is especially common in older singers or those trained in traditional musical theatre, where excess airflow was often encouraged. The result? Muscle tone degrades, and vocal efficiency drops.

Take-home point: If your vocal folds aren’t managing airflow efficiently, it’s not your breathing that’s broken—it’s your engine that needs tuning.

Singing Myth 3. “I need to work on my belt”

This one is big in musical theatre circles, but comes up with rock singers too. “Belting” generally refers to singing high notes with intensity and a particular tonal quality—something more urgent or attention-grabbing than normal singing.

The problem

What most singers mean when they say they want to work on their belt is: “I want to yell my high notes, but without hurting myself.”

That’s not how it works.

Yelling regularly is destructive. It diminishes range and tone over time. It’s hard on the voice, even if it feels intense or effective in the moment.

Just ask Idina Menzel’s critics.

A better approach

A healthy belt is the by-product of even, consistent technique. When your voice is trained well from bottom to top—and you gradually increase your dynamic capacity—a strong, intense upper register is a natural result.

Take-home point: Belting isn’t yelling. A great belt comes from control and conditioning—not force.

Final Thoughts

Each of these myths stems from a seed of truth. Confidence, breath, and power do matter. But focusing on them in isolation—or misunderstanding their role—can lead singers down frustrating paths.

If you want real progress, build technical consistency first. That’s what gives you freedom, confidence, stamina, and power in your singing. Everything else flows from there.

November 22, 2019January 1, 2026

Why vocal problems so regularly derail careers

Something I encounter a lot is the phenomenon of the vocal professional who ‘all of a sudden’ finds themselves having voice problems.

Here’s what normally happens…

At first, the issues are usually shrugged off. Errors are discounted as “just one of those gigs” to others, but inwardly they are a little apprehensive as to why their voice was misbehaving or feeling so off.

Then the issue worsens

Usually in both in severity and frequency. The odd gig starts to get cancelled, and it takes the singer longer and longer to “recover” from one gig for the next one.

Shortly afterwards, the inexorable public announcement follows – typically on their Facebook page – along the following lines… Continue reading “Why vocal problems so regularly derail careers”

June 2, 2019December 12, 2025

Why Breathing Isn’t Your Problem

As a vocal coach, I hear a lot of very similar comments from singers and aspiring singers. In my many years of teaching singing, the most common self-assessment I hear from people discussing their own voice and who want to improve their singing, by far, is:

“I think I’m doing a good job, I just need to work on my breathing“

Of course, other comments are common:
“I need to work on my tone”
“my vocal quality still needs work”
“I reach the high notes but it doesn’t sound that good”

But these are vastly outstripped (or accompanied) by self-assessments of “breathing issues“.

I understand why this comes up.

Many singers will typically think they sound alright, but notice that they run out of breath during specific lines, struggle to finish phrases, etc.

Typically, they feel like they’ve got full lungs of *something* but physically feel like they have to empty and refill before the next section of the song, etc. Breathing is critically important for singing, but I’ve got news for you: breathing probably isn’t your main problem. In fact, most singers’ breathing is typically fine, and the issue lies elsewhere. Continue reading “Why Breathing Isn’t Your Problem”